Just thinking of how to paraphrase this npr article to be much more in perspective of the writer.

I was in my bed enjoying the feel of my egyptian silk sheets watching the State of the Union , thinking of the blessing that His Obama-ness has bestowed on this country. He has single handendly saved the country, he is like the democratic christ or the demo-christ of america or of the whole world, then all of a sudden i heard

"We have to confront the fact that our government spends more than it takes in."

"I propose cuts to things I care deeply about, like community action programs."

I jumped out of my bed like OMG WTF!! Blasphemy! This is blasphemy! This is america, we run the world. You cannot cut community action programs. How can this Obama guy call himself a democrat. democrats dont care about any of these budgetary issues. Who will subsidize the gymn memberships of all those fat women in my district. How will i make money off those useless after school programs that are cluttering up the education system. For goodness sake, I know like 5 people, including me who are going to lose money out of this. WTF is this devil obama thinking?